Thursday, December 30, 2010

4 Steps to Surviving a Singles New Year’s Eve (and Thriving!)


When you’re craving the loving lips of your perfect partner to kiss at midnight, it’s kind of a downer to be all alone.

But you can make 2011 the year you finally meet your ideal mate. And New Year’s Eve is the perfect time to step into a slate-clearing ritual which will be the first step to attracting real love next year.

So instead of heading out to a party, where the sight of all those happy couples might send you into a spiral of depression, here’s an uplifting way to spend the first night of the New Year.

New Year Ritual for Singles

Step 1: Set the Space for Romance

Create a comforting space where you can reflect upon last year and your desires for next year- maybe with candles, music, warm blankets, and your favorite snacks. The mood you are aiming for is gratitude: grateful appreciation for what has been and grateful expectation for what will be.

Step 2: Express Gratitude for the Gifts

Make a gratitude list from all of your dating experience last year. First focus on all of the experiences you don’t actually feel grateful for.

As you list them, tune into what the lesson was in each uncomfortable event. What was the gift? How was it asking you to step into your Best Self? Can you be appreciative of that opportunity? Wrap your list up with all of the dating experiences you actually do feel gratitude for.

Soak in that attitude of gratitude as you read your list out loud, thanking each person for the gem of opportunity they offered to you even if you didn’t recognize the gift until right this moment.

Step 3: Write Your Love Story

From this warm-hearted space, let’s step into your vision of love in the New Year. It’s time to write your very own love story. Yup- I want you to imagine what it will look and feel like once you are happily in love with your ideal partner.

Picture a scene you are looking forward to experiencing and write it out with all the details of every sense- what will you see, feel, hear, touch, taste, smell? Bring it to life in all it’s glory. Now you have a visualization you can use every day- once you step into this feeling, you become a mate magnet.

Step 4: Invite Your Mate to Join You

Standing in your power as a mate magnet, the last step to our ritual is to compose a letter to your beloved. After experiencing this future scene, what are all of the things you wish to say to the love of your life?

Consider this paper at once a thank you note, a love letter, and a personal invitation for this person to appear in your life. Once it’s done, place it in an envelope, and put it in a special drawer that you have cleared to be your partners once they show up.

Then go to sleep with the grateful expectation that real love will be yours in the new year, knowing that you just set the stage perfectly for your true love to walk into your life and sweep you off your feet.

Singles: How will you welcome love into the New Year? Share!

Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Top 5 Must-Do New Years Resolutions for Singles


If you are ringing in the New Year all alone, chances are you’re ready to finally find love in 2011.

Of course, January is the perfect time to wipe your slate clean of last year’s love mistakes to ensure that next year really is filled with lasting love.

If you are serious about fast forwarding to the relationship of your dreams, it’s time to commit to the following six resolutions.

1. Bust Old Patterns

If your luck in love is going to be different next year, the first thing you need to do is get honest with yourself about the patterns that are holding you back.

Think back through the last few years- which experiences have you had over and over? Do you pursue while he withdraws? Are you forever rescuing her?

Resolve to catch yourself making the same mistakes, then walk away, so you can create new, healthy habits pronto.

2. Date Outside Your Type

Chances are if “your type” hasn’t panned out for you by now, it’s time to discover a new type. Quirky artist not working out so well? Mr. Wall Street never emotionally available?

Resolve to date outside your normal comfort zone. Consider opening up your expectations in regard to age, height, income, race, job, etc.

Soulmates come in unexpected packages- broaden your horizon and you’re more apt to stumble upon an unexpected perfect match.

3. Ditch the Duds Fast

The best way to fast forward to The One? Stop wasting your time with people who are clearly only Mr./Ms. Right Now.

As long as you give away your valuable time, attention, and emotion to the wrong partner, you’ll never find the right relationship. Limit yourself to three months of dating, if the bond doesn’t obviously have more potential by then, move on.

4. Blast through Dating Ruts

Yup- doing what you’ve always done, will get you what you’ve always gotten. If you haven’t found the right partner during your usual routine, it’s time to get creative in your daily & dating activities.

Join new groups, take novel classes, or frequent different coffee shops, bookstores, hiking trails, & grocery stores. Your ideal mate is out there- if you are always somewhere new, doing something different, you maximize the chances of serendipity working it’s magic.

5. Share Your Best Self

Maybe it’s not just what you are doing that needs a makeover, but who you are and how you show up! Get real with yourself by asking: What about you isn’t as attractive as it could be?

Ask your closest friend for honest feedback. Do you tend to be overly anxious or pessimistic? Are quick to pass judgment or so shy you fade into the background? Maybe it’s time to hit the gym, get some cute clothes, or try a new hairstyle?

When you step into your best self, you’ll more naturally attract a better partner- the one you truly deserve.

By making these 5 commitments, you’ll be well on your way to making 2011 the year you finally find true love!


Readers: What's your New Years Resolution to find love? Please share!

Monday, December 20, 2010

3 Steps to Finding Love in 2011



Being single around the holidays can, well, suck. But it doesn’t have to for long, because you can focus on getting jazzed up about finally finding The One in 2011.

Woo-hoo!

To boost your chances of attracting real love next year, there are really only 3 simple steps you need to take. If you start focusing on them now, by the time you ring in the New Year, you can be fast-forwarding yourself towards the love you deserve.

But, if you get all bah-hum-bug on me and stay stuck in a rut of old patterns. Well, I hate to say it, but 2011 will probably look a lot like 2010 did- without the love of your life gracing your days.

So, let’s leap into the New Year ready to manifest real, lasting love into your life.

Get started now with these 3 Steps for Finding Love in 2011

1. Extend Gratitude for your Love Lessons

Before you’ll be ready to really attract a new kind of love that is deeply fulfilling, you’ll have to take a serious look at what you created last year in the love department.

Sit down with a notebook and go through all of your love experiences in 2010 and identify the MAJOR LESSONS each experience invited you to learn.

Now, dig deep into your heart and express some gratitude to each of these people who offered these lessons- because if you had not learned these lessons you wouldn’t be ready to meet The One.

Really.

So find the part of your heart that can really and truly be thankful for each and every one of these not so perfect partners.


2. Clarify the Pattern

With your lessons front and center, you should be able to recognize the patterns you tend to play out in your love life.

Take some thoughtful time to get super clear about:

- The kind of partner you tend to attract (the good and not so good qualities)

- The kinds of unhappy interactions you tend to have with partners

- The ways in which your needs tend to remain unfulfilled

- The behaviors you engage in which keep this cycle going on


3. Set Your Action Plan

Awesome- now that you know what ISN’T working, commit to doing something new that will work!

Based on your insights about the old patterns, create some new dating rules for yourself so you can create a new pattern. And get a buddy to hold you accountable so that real love can be yours this year.

For example,

- If fear held you back and you hardly met anyone last year, grab a single friend and commit to going to 2 singles events a month.


- If you keep falling for emotionally unavailable partners, commit to walking out the door as soon as you see the old warning signs so you can stay available for a great partner.


- If you tend to find fault with everyone you date, commit to giving everyone 3 chances- you never know what a little time might do for your bond.


You get the idea- bust out of your dating ruts, and soon lasting love can be your reward. Make 2011 the year you finally find The One- you deserve it.

And we’ll be right here with you, supporting you toward creating Authentic Attraction that can result in Love that Lasts a Lifetime!

Give yourself the gift of love! Not sure how to clear the old patterns? Our 3 part- e-course, Super Charge Your Soulmate Magnet will help you shift out of the old so you can begin attracting real love right away!

Ready to take action now? I found my husband online and you can too- I can help: Meet Your Mate Online